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PPI #107: How to Deal with Everyday Anxieties

Eric Partaker

SUMMARY 

  • Create Clarity – An anxious mind is a clouded mind. The first way to create clarity is to develop a meditation practice.
  • Develop a Simple Planning Routine – Anxiety reduces when you’re not worried about what you need to do. Plan and schedule everything into your life. 
  • Get Some Sleep! – An anxious mind is a tired mind. Focus on your energy and recovery. If you’re not getting enough sleep, you will be more prone to anxiety.
  • Start Your Day With Some Exercise – An energized mind is going to be less anxious.
  • Take a Break – Don’t work endlessly with no break at all. Anxiety will reduce if you’re taking plenty of breaks throughout the day.
  • Express Your Ambitions To Others – An anxious mind is a repressed mind. When you keep feelings in, it contributes to your anxiety.
  • What Are You Afraid Of? – Fears will create anxiety. The act of stepping into the fears will build your confidence.

TRANSCRIPT

Many people struggle with anxiety. They get too anxious on a daily basis. They worry about too many things, and they don’t make the progress that they’re seeking. As a result, they feel unfulfilled, imprisoned, and just not living the life that they want.

Hi, my name is Eric Partaker, and I’m on a mission to help people realize their full potential in both their work and life. And when it comes to having anxieties on an everyday basis, this is something that used to plague me all the time. I’d start my day with the best intentions, and then something would happen along the way of the day. I’d get a little bit worked up about it, and suddenly it would just derail all the progress I had hoped to make on that day. But it doesn’t need to be this way.

And you may think that, “Well, I’m just like this. I’m an anxious person. I’ll never overcome this,” but then you would be wrong. Our capacity for change is enormous. And in this video, I’m going to give you a handful of things that you can use so that you can change from suffering from these everyday anxieties to becoming what you want to become, to achieving what you want to achieve in a way that doesn’t feel plagued by anxiety or worry or fear. The first thing is to recognize that an anxious mind is a clouded mind.

We need to create clarity. And how do we create clarity? Well, there’s a couple of ways in particular that are scientifically proven to reduce anxiety, and the first thing is to develop a meditation practice. Now, you may not have a meditation practice. I never did. I didn’t know a thing about meditation, but I learned. Our capacity, once again, for change, for learning, it’s nearly limitless. No matter how old you are or how unfamiliar meditation is, it’s something that you can learn. There are so many resources online.

There’s apps. There’s so many tools. There’s books. So many different ways where you can learn to meditate. And you can start with just one minute a day. At the start of your day, just a deep breathing meditation. Keep your eyes closed. Inhale through your nose for the count of five seconds. Hold it for a moment, and then exhale for the count of seven seconds. That’s 12 seconds altogether. Do that five times, one, two, three, four, five cycles. You’ve reached a minute. Just try that.

Just that on its own will clear some of the clouds in your mind, will clear some of that anxiety. Remember, an anxious mind is a clouded mind. So we need to create clarity, and one of the simple ways to create clarity is through a meditation practice. I would encourage you to try to get that practice up to from… Starting from a minute a day up to about 10 minutes a day, but start small. Start in a way where you can’t fail. And using that technique, a 60 second meditation, is a great starting point.

Another way that you can create more clarity in your mind so that you can remove those clouds of anxiety is to just develop a simple planning routine. And I find that the best day, the best time to plan your day is never the morning of, but it’s actually at the end of your previous day. At the end of your previous day, do this simple thing, just decide, what are the top three things I’m going to work on tomorrow? And look at your calendar and decide, when will I work on those things?

It immediately reduces anxiety, because you’re not worried about the things that you need to do. You’ve already thought that through, and you’re not worried when you’re going to do them. You’ve already looked at your calendar and you planned them in. I mean, you can go ahead and actually schedule those things as appointments in your day. So in summary, an anxious mind is a clouded mind, meaning we need to create clarity. How do we create clarity? One of the ways we can do it is through a really simple meditation practice in the morning.

And another way we can do it is by planning the top three things that we want to do for the following day as a way to end our current day. Number two, an anxious mind is a tired mind. So what we need to do here is focus on our energy and recovery. When our energy is low, when we’re not having enough covering in our day, then we will make ourselves… We create a fertile ground for anxiety, and it starts with making sure that you’re getting enough sleep. Scientifically proven, if you’re not getting enough sleep, you will be more prone to anxiety.

It will be more difficult for you to not worry about even the smallest thing. You’ll be more prone to irritation. What do we need to do? Follow the eight hour rule. We need eight hours of sleep. There’s a great quote, “Often the bridge between despair and hope is a good night’s sleep.” That’s something that really works from an anxiety point of view as well. Are you getting eight hours of sleep? Because if you’re not, that could be your anxiety solution right there. Just that one alone could clear a lot of the anxiety that you’re feeling.

Eight hours of sleep, super important. If you really want to increase your odds of getting eight hours of sleep, try this simple trick as well too. Don’t have any electronics on. Don’t have any on in the last hour before bed. Because when you do, it actually inhibits your brain’s ability to get you into a deep state of sleep. Again, scientifically proven. Keep the electronics off one hour before bedtime so that you can get eight hours of sleep.

Another thing that you can do to really focus on your recovery is make sure that you start off your day with some exercise. You might think, “Well, how does that actually help me from a recovery point of view? How does that help me not feel tired?” Well, because when you exercise, you generate energy. And when you generate energy, it counters any feelings of fatigue. And when you have energy, when your mind is feeling alive and vibrant, it’s less likely to feel those clouds of anxiety coming over or coming through. An energized mind is going to be less anxious.

And then as you progress throughout your day, think about installing a little break routine. Don’t just work endlessly with no break at all. That will lead to more anxious feelings. You’ll prime yourself for not feeling anxious by making sure you’re taking plenty of breaks throughout the day. I just recommend every 15 minutes, take a break for five, 10 minutes. Don’t work until you’re ready to fall over. 

But yeah, make sure that you’re prioritizing your recovery, because an anxious mind is a tired mind. Number three, an anxious mind is a repressed mind. What do I mean by that? We become more anxious when we’re not expressing our ambitions to others, when we’re not saying what it is that we stand for, when we’re not expressing our feelings. When we keep that stuff in, it contributes to our anxiety. So if you’re feeling anxious, ask yourself, am I sharing what I truly want with my friends, with the world? Am I standing up for what I believe in?

Am I expressing how I feel? Because if you’re not doing those things, you’re going to make yourself prone to anxiety. You’re going to feel more worried about stuff. So a simple anxiety solution is to make sure you’re expressing yourself. An anxious mind is a repressed mind. The counter to that is expression, express yourself, express your ambitions, express what you stand for, express how you feel last. Last but not least, an anxious mind is a fearful mind. I want you to ask yourself right now, what are you afraid of?

Because those fears will create anxiety. And I want you to flip the script here. Because the way you feel less anxious is not by suddenly feeling more confident to step into your fears, it’s the act of stepping into the fears, which will build your confidence, which leads to you feeling less anxious about life and about the things that you’re doing and the things that you want to achieve. As an example, if you’re fearful of something that you think is going to be very challenging, very difficult for you, great. Perfect. Flip the script, say to yourself, “Bring it on.”

Step into that direction. It’s like a signpost saying, “It’s in this direction that you must step.” Step into the discomfort. Step into the challenge. It is the act of doing that which will alleviate your fear over time. It is the act of stepping into those things which will alleviate your anxiety over time. Don’t sit around waiting to feel more confident, to feel more courageous, to feel less anxious, so that you can step into those fears. You got it the wrong way around. It’s stepping into the fears that create what you seek.

The obstacle becomes the direction in which you must go. Last but not least, when it comes to the subject of fear, a fearful mind creating an anxious mind, there may be things where you’re afraid, well, yeah, but I might fail. I might not succeed again. Again, great, because that’s how we learn. It’s not just through continuous winning that we learn. It’s also through mistakes. It’s also through failure. Some of our best learnings come through making mistakes. Get on that mistake kind of learners high, that desire to, I’m going to make mistakes.

It’s all just data in the end. I’m collecting data. I collect data from the things that go well. I collect data from the things that don’t go well. And when I combine that all together, it makes me able to improve going forward. So an anxious mind is a fearful mind, but flip the script. Step into the fears, because it’s by doing those things, stepping into the challenges, stepping into the hardships, stepping into the discomfort, putting yourself out there willing to make a mistake, willing to fail, that allows you to become more confident and therefore less anxious.

I hope you’ve enjoyed that. And if you head over to my website at ericpartaker.com, you can also subscribe to my weekly Peak Performance Insights newsletter.

Follow:
Eric has been named "CEO of the Year" at the 2019 Business Excellence Awards, one of the "Top 30 Entrepreneurs in the UK" by Startups Magazine, and among "Britain's 27 Most Disruptive Entrepreneurs" by The Telegraph.
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